The next couple of days were really rough... we started getting bits and pieces of more information. We found out how she did it, she started an IV in her foot, gave herself etomidate and I think vec, I really have to think she had planned it for a while. The last anyone heard from her was on Tues by text about mid afternoon. It's believed that she either did it on Tues or Wed. When she was found she had been there a while, she had written several drafts for the suicide note. No one knows what the final one says the police still have it. But some of the drafts just said I'm sorry I'm tired. She had turned the thermostat down to about 50 degrees. I believe she had planned it, that she didn't want to survive it, that she didn't want to be wheeled into JPS and worked on by her peers. Or be in a coma in ICU. It all still just seems so unreal to me! She always seemed so happy! She was just so young, only 23 years old!
I kind of think that maybe this was something she might have been struggling with and she just didn't want anyone to know. Maybe she was embarrassed or maybe she just didn't want to burden anyone with her problems. I don't know! I just feel so numb, it all seems like a bad dream that I'm so desperately ready to wake from.
I was kind of disappointed that I missed the viewing, it ended up being on Easter Sunday, and I had to work. Trying to get someone to work for you on Easter is let's just say not easy.
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